Gossip

I have to be honest I used to gossip. I used it as a way for me to form bonds with other friends but I felt bad when I did it. I was attracting people who thrived on complaining, negative talking, gossip, and judging. I was attracting them because I was one of them.

The cycle of murmuring or gossiping about others is a vicious cycle. It might start out with just a mild judgement and it can end in feelings being hurt and/or the loss of a friend. We rationalize it with "I am just venting." or "I am talking good about them". Conversations can be twisted, rumors can get started and it will only end badly.

It has taken me a long time to see the truth in this. I thought that if I felt they were in the wrong I had every right to talk about them. This is short sided. Not only should I not be judging my fellow man but my friends and family deserve the best of me.

My gossiping, negativity all stemmed from my insecurities. I was the victim. I had to tell everyone how wrong everyone else was so I could feel better about myself. Finding fault in others somehow took them off the pedestal I had put them on. Then they could be down in the dirt with the rest of us. It is sick and sad but the truth.

The saddest part of all this negative talk is that we are usually complaining about friends or loved ones. The people that we are supposed to hold closest to us.

I know that this cycle starts with me. It all begins with my emotions. I don't allow my insecurities to do my thinking for me. My thoughts then turn positive and anger subsides. I then have to voice my own values and stick of for those that are not present. I have choices: I can walk away, change the subject, or stick up for those wronged. It can all start or end with me. I can make a difference.

When we really think about all of these things that I have discussed above, we can realize none of us are perfect. Embrace each other's differences and judge not. The friends and family that have come across my path I have loved and learned from. I hope that I live my life in a way that shows how much I appreciate them.